Like a phoenix rising : separated women struggling through lone motherhood

Abstract

Single mothers are generally described as poor, unhappy and oppressed. To add on many claim that children reared by single mothers have by far more problems than children living within a conventional family context. Throughout this research I chose to focus on separated women with children. This is due to the fact that there has been much research dedicated to the issue of young unmarried mothers. Moreover once marriage is involved the situation is totally different and so are the implications of such a life-changing event. Public representations of motherhood hardly include single motherhood - the voice of the mothers themselves is very often absent. Hence the aim of my research, being a qualitative one, was to make these very voices audible. Using semi-structured interviews with five case-studies, these women had the opportunity of speaking of an experience which is too often absent from the cultural representations of motherhood. Rather than viewing single motherhood as a problem I consider it as a particular family pathway. I believe that it is wrong to claim monopoly on warmth and intimacy and my opinion, is that contrary to popular belief one-parent families do function well. This principle is derived from the fact that despite the great ordeals that exist along the way, single mothers have strengths and resources beyond compare. I chose to symbolize these women through the image of the phoenix for according to the legend, though totally consumed by fire it has the strength to rise from amid the ashes. In the same way separated women struggling through lone motherhood are able to rise from the memories of a bitter past to provide a better life for themselves and for their children.